


The Ripe Moment

by Hekate1308



Series: Right Timing [3]
Category: Endeavour (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-01-21
Updated: 2018-01-21
Packaged: 2019-03-07 14:46:56
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,880
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13437060
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Hekate1308/pseuds/Hekate1308
Summary: She isn’t sure she can love anyone like this anymore, or if she ever has, until her and Endeavour grow close.





	The Ripe Moment

She isn’t sure she can love anyone like this anymore, or if she ever has, until her and Endeavour grow close.

Of course she still calls him Morse. But somehow, he’s become Endeavour in her head ever since she returned to Oxford and moved back in with her parents (the parents she still hasn’t told about the miscarriage, she thinks, guilt once more rearing its ugly head).

Endeavour just feels... more intimate than Morse, and considering he proposed to her –

She can’t let herself believe that he actually loves her. It was simply the act of a good man, trying to help a stupid girl who got herself in trouble, and if she were actually as worthless as Ray told her when she left, she might have accepted him.

Of course now the problem’s gone anyway, thanks to her fall, and sometimes at night, she doesn’t know for sure if it was an accident.

And yet life goes on, as it always has, until one night she doesn’t know how to evade her parents’ worried glances and tells them she’s going to meet a friend and ends up at Endeavour’s place.

He’s actually good company, even if he doesn’t believe so himself.

When she’s with him, it’s easier to breathe. Maybe because he knows the truth no one else knows. That no one else will ever know.

Endeavour turns out to be a surprisingly good dancer – although she probably shouldn’t be startled, considering all the music he listens to – and by the time she realizes that his arms make her feel at home and safe, she’s already in the middle of falling for him and it’s too late.

She’s never felt like this. There were crushes, of course, fancies, exactly the kind that make any father of a teenage daughter nervous but only amused Mom; but nothing like this, when the simple act of opening the door for him each morning sends her heart a-flutter.

It makes her think of Blake. She wonders if Endeavour knows the lines too. Probably.

 _If you trap the moment before its ripe_ __  
The tears of repentance you’ll certainly wipe  
But if once you let the ripe moment go  
You can never wipe off the tears of woe

It’s what she did, isn’t it? If only she’d known then. If only they’d been able to...

It doesn’t matter now. She’s his friend, she’ll always be his friend. There is comfort in that.

One night at a dance club, she thinks she sees one of Morse’s colleagues, but doesn’t mention it. She doesn’t want to embarrass him. And since he never speaks of it, it seems nothing happened anyway.

He’s drinking less than he used to, she can tell. He rarely smells of liquor when she visits him, and Dad mentions one day that he’s started to order orange juice in pubs.

Around the same time, he starts dropping hints that Endeavour might be dating someone. Joan is rather confused. They spend so much time together that she should definitely have noticed.

Dad becomes... a tad annoying as time goes on. She thought he was over her leaving, but he’s suddenly very interested in her comings and goings, demanding who these “friends” she spends her time with are.

She can’t very well tell him that it’s his Sergeant though. The last thing she wants is Dad being angry at Morse. It’s not his fault she couldn’t see what was right in front of her this entire time.

And then comes the day she didn’t even dare hope for anymore. She’s complaining about Dad, and Morse is looking at her, and –

Not even Joan, with her bad track record, can mistake the expression in his eyes.

She kisses him and it’s both everything and nothing like she imagined.

Later, they’re cuddling in bed, and he asks her if she’s happy in that shy, gentle way of his. She smiles. Happy isn’t quite the right word – ecstatic would fit better, she feels.

Their relationship progresses. She spends her nights and whole weekends in his flat, picking his ties for him every morning before going to the bank – she’s returned to her job there because she actually likes it well enough – and it’s not long before Mum tells Dad at dinner one day “Morse is always so well-dressed now, and he looks so happy too” and feels a strange surge of pride.

Oh dear. She’s become that woman, the one who doesn’t mind looking after her boyfriend. Oh well. There are worse reasons to be proud.

They have yet to speak of the future. Endeavour’s Dad’s bagman, he’ll have to learn about them eventually, especially if... if...

He has never mentioned his proposal since that night, but she knows what her answer would be i he did.

It’s only after one of their dates that she learns the truth; from the corner of her eyes, she sees him reach for her hand, then drop it, as if he’s scared to touch her in public.

They are on the same page then, just at different paragraphs. They’ll get there.

But there is no time, since a few days later Dad calls Mom, telling her Morse has been injured, and she takes one look at Joan’s face and knows the truth. Without another word, she calls a cab. During the ride, she takes her hand and holds it tight.

How often, she wonders, has Mom been in this exact situation? Didn’t she promise herself that she’d never fall in love with a policeman, so she wouldn’t have to go through this? She’s failed spectacularly.

But, as she storms into the hospital and finds Endeavour sitting up, she can’t bring herself to mind. She all but jumps into his arms, crying out his Christian name.

It’s one way for Dad to find out.

The next few days are... awkward. He doesn’t say anything against it, per se; but it’s rather clear he’s also far from giving them his blessing.

Not that it matters. She’s made her choice, she loves Endeavour Morse, and he will be her husband.

Eventually, Dad knocks on her door one evening. When she opens up, she sees he’s dressed to go out, a bottle of liquor in his hands.

“He doesn’t drink anymore” she says firmly. He looks at her and nods.

He returns that night, the bottle still unopened, and she realizes Endeavour loves her enough to pass test after test, if need be.

The next day, she goes to his place after work. He’s long since given her a key anyway.

When he opens the door and smells the dinner she’s cooking, he asks, “Can I expect to come home to this every day?”

She winks at him. “Not yet; only after marriage.”

“Oh no, what will I have to live with” he deadpans, wrapping his arms around her from behind. “DCI Thursday was rather nice to me today.”

“You realize you’ll have to call him something else eventually, right?”

He kisses her head. “Baby steps, love.”

He’s never given her a pet name before. She decides she likes it.

**Wedding Day**

As expected, she likes Joyce a lot, and her new sister-in-law seems to be just as happy about their marriage as they are. “I was worried that Endeavour would end up an old maid.”

“Joyce” he complains, even though he doesn’t flinch at his given name anymore as he used to.

“Don’t worry, I’ll take care of him” she promises.

“He better do the same, otherwise I’m moving in.”

“Don’t you dare.”

It’s something new to see Endeavour carefree and happy, bantering with his sister as she does with Sam. As if the thought has summoned him, her brother appears next to her. “I am utterly disappointed; Dad didn’t even blow a fuse.”

“You should have seen him when he first found out.”

“Too bad I missed it. Looks like he’s reconciled to it now, though” he replies, watching their father clasp Morse’s shoulder.

“Just wait. He’s probably threatening him and every moment now Endeavour will come to the conclusion that I’m not worth it.”

“Never. Still can’t get used to Endeavour though.”

“You better – he’s family now.”

“You think he wasn’t already?”

**Several years later**

They’ve never really spoken about it.

Having children.

Despite what the doctor said at the time, she’s never been entirely sure that she could get pregnant again, and since a few years have gone by since her wedding, she never thought...

She swallows. She usually arrives home first in the evenings, so there is nothing special about waiting for her husband... only tonight, there is.

She doesn’t say anything when he arrives home, just throws herself in his arms with a sob.

“Joan?” he asks, rubbing her back. “What’s wrong, my love?”

“Nothing” she mumbles, “I’m pregnant.”

She raises her head to find him staring at her, a look of awe on his face. “I’m going to be a father?” he whispers.

She nods. He gently touches her stomach. “I’ll try my best” he vows, “No matter what.”

They both will.

**Six months later**

Watching her husband hold their son for the first time, Joan is lost for words. Endeavour is studying his face, undoubtedly looking for resemblances and finding them – she can already tell their boy has his nose.

“I think we should call him Fred” he whispers, as if scared that too loud a voice would startle the child.

“Fred? Dad’ll like it. If you’re sure...”

He looks up. “I owe this man everything, Joan.”

She huffs. “Surely not –“

“That’s not what I meant” he says, leaning down to kiss her. “I would be nothing without you.”

**Two years later**

He hasn’t said anything, of course, probably because he feels they shouldn’t give their daughter a nmea based on a belief neither of them share. But she knows he thinks of his mother a lot, especially since she confided in him that after their wonderful boy, she’d like a girl.

And so, she spends a bit of her maternal leave looking up virtue names. Most of them are what she expected – she doesn’t think them quite as bad as Endeavour does, but then she’s rather biased when it comes to them. You can’t love a man without loving the sound of his name on your lips.

Most girl names sound downright dowdy, except for a few. Prudence, for example. And Prue is a rather cute nickname.

So, when she and her husband and their newborn daughter are left alone together for the first, she says, “I have an idea for a name.”

“Hm?” he hums, not exactly paying attention, but she can hardly blame him for that – just like when Fred was born, he’s holding his child for the first time, familiarizing himself with her features, utterly enchanted.

“I think we should call her Prudence.”

That makes him look up. “Prudence?”

“Yes. Prue for short. She does look like it, wouldn’t you think?”

As always, they don’t need many words. He understands. “So you hope she’ll be more prudent than her father?” is all he asks, smiling.

“Please. My genes have to play a part too.”

He laughs and gently kisses her just before the door opens and Mom and Dad enter, accompanied by little Fred.


End file.
